THE PRINCE AND THE PEE

PARENTS AND PEEING. Mummy and Daddy explained to me that now I am soon going to be three, I should pee in the toilet. I thought it was quite fun at first, being a big boy and all that. But the parents seem to be a bit odd about it all. They both got very excited that I could pee in the toilet. I didn’t think it was that hard – they hadn’t asked me to do it before. I did it a few times and then I thought we’d played that game long enough – and only then did I realise they want me to play it forever. Parents are very odd- but never mind, if it makes them happy… Then we went down to visit Grandpa and Granma. Scones were ready when I got there so I ate some and then I agreed with Mummy to go to the toilet. Mummy doesn’t seem able to look at me without thinking of the toilet – it’s quite sad really. I expected the grandparents to see how peculiar this all was, but no, they were very impressed as well and clapped and said how clever I was. Anyway, I was doing a jigsaw puzzle of Thomas the Tank in the livingroom on my own, when I felt the need to go. However the puzzle was almost finished and I thought I could hold on until it was done. I did finish it and only then did I realise I had left things too late. What’s a chap to do? So I was standing, peeing in the livingroom, when Daddy came in and started shouting at me. He went on about Granma’s carpet – she would never have noticed. He yanked me off to the toilet – I’m getting quite sick of the sight of it – and went on and on about how I had always to tell him when I needed to go, and damaging the carpet, and how we only had one pair of dry shorts left. I thought, I do usually tell him but I just didn’t have time; Granma’s carpet would dry and I couldn’t remember that she has ever been that interested in it; and it was a warm day so I could just go without shorts. But Daddy looked very grumphy so I just kept my thoughts to myself. Anyway, I managed OK for the rest of the day – apart from a tiny accident but it was round by the compost heap so nobody noticed and then I did some watering with my watering can so they would think I had spilled it on my shorts. Then we had dinner and since I distinctly remember Daddy saying that I should tell him every time I needed to go, I thought he would be pleased that I managed to go 4 times during the meal. Instead he just looked very fed up and at the last time he said, ‘Oh, not again.’ Really, there’s no pleasing some people. Granma laughed and Daddy said it wasn’t funny. The grandparents are nearly as odd as the parents. I see I’d better get the hang of this peeing business before they all get too odd altogether. It’s hard looking after the adults.

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About adhocannie
I am a good natured woman with a long memory and a swift tongue. I like loooking at things and thinking about them. Also food, clothes, travel, reading, sewing. I try to see the ridiculous in things, but sobriety of reflection keeps edgting in. I have husband, children, grandchildren, friends... I feel rich in things that matter. I am a happy exile. I like writing. I do not like talking about me (though I do.). You willl be much more interesting.

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